So it seems that this has now become a biweekly blog. Sorry to all those who check in weekly for some SaraTalk.
It’s been a busy and tough month I tell ya. Being one man down on the farm we are getting up a bit earlier, working a little later, but such is the life of a farmer. You make do, and simply don’t get around to doing some things. There is a never ending list of things to do, and you just have to figure out what your priorities are.
Farm life has actually been a breeze in comparison to my social life. I missed most of last week so that I could come home to be with friends and family after the loss of a loved one. And so I would like to take the time to pay tribute to Brenda, a loving mother, grandmother, sister, aunt, friend and confidant.
I actually began writing this blog yesterday but feel it would have been a very sad blog. And so I am happy I waited and am rewriting it today with a different tone.
With every loss there is a gain, and with every gain there is a loss. There is no bad without good, and no good without bad. I believe it is important to be aware of both, but even more important to choose to focus on the good.
Brenda was (and is) a wonderful, amazing and inspiring person. It amazes me how caring and loving she was. She has touched so many people with her love and taught people how important it is to love others. I can only hope to be as caring and loving as she.
Brenda had the ability to make everyone around her feel special and important. She has taught me so much and I will forever be grateful for that. As I continue forward, every decision I make and action I take will have been influenced in some way by her. And so although she may be gone in the physical sense, she will forever be with me, and with us.
I feel that as our society has become more individualistic, we have become somewhat disconnected from our neighbours, our friends and our family. Many of us (I very much include myself in this) are rushing around following our dreams, doing what we want to do when we want to do it. And as much as this is important, and there is no right or wrong way to live one’s life, it is also important to take the time to care and be compassionate to all those around us. And especially important to nurture the relationships in our lives that matter to us.
I have begun to realize the importance of surrounding myself with people who truly care for me, and for whom I truly care. We sometimes spread ourselves too thin and find ourselves rushing around trying to make plans and see all of our friends and loved ones. I’ve always been one to say “the more the merrier” but there needs to be, as usual, a balance. For sometimes, when we try to do too much, we ultimately end up having less of ourselves to give to each individual. We have less energy, less time. We cannot be everywhere at once, and we cannot be everyone’s best friend and confidant. No one relationship will be the same and I believe it is important to surround yourself with people who make you feel special, who make you laugh, who inspire you and motivate you. People with whom you can sometimes sit in silence, and other times have meaningful conversations.
I’ve also realized that I enjoy spending one on one time with my friends and family. It is wonderful to be able to see lots of friends and family all at once, but in these instances we tend to have shorter, superficial conversations (small talk) and do not get to connect with one another as we would in a more private setting.
And so, although it’s been a pretty shitty week (I’m not going to lie), I realize that I have learnt a lot and grown as a person because of it. They say “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” and it is very true. I feel like I have lost some very important people from my life recently, but even though they may no longer be physically by my side, they will always be with me for they have each made me a better person and I am so lucky to have known them.
Life can’t be roses and balloons all the time. Although I do work at being happy and choose to be happy, happiness is always something that has come pretty easy to me, and I’m very thankful for that. But I am human, and I can’t always be smiles. It’s normal to sometimes feel sad, mad, sorrow or guilt but what’s important is to not let these feelings overtake you and bring you down. There would be no happiness, without some type of opposite, and it is part of life to feel all these emotions, but more important to keep moving, keep your head up and have faith (whatever you choose to have faith in).
Although it has been hard to keep moving this week, I know I need to keep putting one foot in front of the other (for soon I’ll be walking out the doo-o-or). If not for myself, then for Brenda because I know she wants the best for all of us and she would want us to follow our dreams and live our life to the fullest.
So Cheers to you Brenda, for being so amazing and for inspiring us all!
I thank you from the bottom of my heart,
All my love,